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The cure for female insecurity

Sunday, August 09, 2015

Today’s women are desperately insecure.  There is no question that our lives are teetering on the edge of disaster; that self-hatred, self-abuse, and self-destruction have become the norm among the female camp.  And sadly, women in the church are struggling just as much as their non-Christian counterparts.

But the modern solution – the self esteem message – doesn’t provide lasting results against female insecurity.  Why?  Because the solution presented is all about self.  Self-love, self-acceptance, and self-promotion.  Love yourself.  Be true to yourself.  Live to yourself.  Some of these messages even go as far as to say that by living this way, we will bring glory to God.

But what is the pattern of Scripture?

Christ said, “Whoever desires to come after Me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow Me.” (Mark 8:34 NKJV) The word “deny” here literally translates: to forget one’s self, lose sight of one’s self and one’s own interests.  We are meant to let all thoughts of self become swallowed up in Him.

The secret to becoming the radiant, beautiful princess of our childhood dreams is forgetting all about our self and becoming completely consumed with only one thing – Jesus Christ.  Just as John the Baptist who declared, “I must decrease, so that He might increase!”

This isn’t just the secret to living out the true Gospel; it’s also the secret to glowing with divine loveliness.  It’s the cure for female insecurity.

Think about it.  A woman who has truly denied herself, taken up her cross, and become entirely consumed with Jesus Christ is not going to be an insecure young woman, starving herself and obsessed with making herself look more attractive.  Rather, she’s so enraptured with Jesus Christ that she’s completely lost sight of herself.  As Bishop Bardsley put it, “They care not at all what the world thinks of them, because they are entirely taken up with the tremendous realities of their King.”

A woman who has yielded her selfish agenda to the Spirit of Jesus Christ, who does not listen to the voice of her self but yields only to the voice of her King is not going to become a sex object, throwing herself at guy after guy in desperation.  Her security comes from a completely different source.  She doesn’t derive her value from the attention of guys.  Her value comes from knowing she has been redeemed and loved by the King of all kings.  Her focus is on His desires, not on her own selfish wants.

The women throughout Christian history who have truly glowed with heavenly beauty all had one thing in common – an emptying of self.  They were so caught up in the things of God that they gave no thought to their own lives.  They did not seek to draw eyes to themselves.  The sought to bring glory to Jesus Christ alone.

As a result, they were some of the most confident, poised and courageous women that have ever lived.  They accomplished amazing things for the Kingdom of God.  They saved lives.  They stood before Kings.  They rescued dying children.  They reformed societies.

And they did it without spending their time and energy focused on self.

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