30 Quotes to cheer you up today

We all need a bit of cheering all the time. If you’re in need of a good laugh, and really, who isn’t? — then check out our list of 30 funny quotes to cheer you up.

In life, there is nothing that works faster to bring your mind and body back into balance than a good laugh.  And a day without laughter is a day wasted. The Bible says in Proverbs 17:22: A  joyful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones. Here are our favourite 30 Quotes to cheer you up today.

  • Jesus is my Saviour not my religion – Unknown

  • If a book about failures doesn't sell, is it a success ~ Jerry Seinfeld

  • I came from a real tough neighbourhood. Once a guy pulled a knife on me. I knew he wasn't a professional; the knife had butter on it ~ Rodney Dangerfield

  • I’m not waiting until my hair turns white to become patient and wise. Nope, I’m dyeing my hair tonight ~ Jarod Kintz

  • I live in my own little world. But its ok, they know me here ~ Lauren Myracle

  • Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else – Unknown

  • Read the Bible - It will scare the Hell out of you ~ Unknown

  • The way some people find fault, you'd think there was some kind of reward. ~ Unknown

  • If another woman steals your man, there's no better revenge than letting her keep him. Real men can’t be stolen ~ Unknown.

30 Quotes to cheer you up


  • I can please only one person per day. Today is not your day. Tomorrow isn't looking good, either ~ Unknown

  • Please cancel my subscription, I've had enough of your issues ~ Unknown

  • Complain and remain. Praise and be raised – Joyce Meyer

  • Stop crying about being a doormat and get off the floor – Unknown

  • If you are talking behind my back, you are in a good position to kiss my behind ~ Unknown

  • When you feel that you are drowning in, don’t worry your life guard walked on water – Unknown

  • Follow your heart, but take your brain with you ~ Unknown

  • Sometimes it takes a big fall to really know where you stand ~ Hayley Williams

  • Don’t make a permanent decision for a temporary emotion

  • You know you're in love when you can't fall asleep Collect moments not things ~ Unknown


  • Happy people are thankful people – Inside Woman Online

  • Those who drink to drown their sorrows should be told that sorrows know how to swim – Unknown

  • If you're too open minded, your brains will fall out!" ~ Lawrence Ferlinghetti

  • Etc. – End of Thinking Capacity ~Unknown

  • My life is all math. I am trying to add to my income, subtract from my weight, divide my time, and avoid multiplying ~ Unknown

  • When I was growing up I always wanted to be someone. Now I realize I should have been more specific ~ Lily Tomlin

  • My wife and I always compromise. I admit I'm wrong and she agrees with me ~ Unknown

  • If only losing weight was as easy as losing my cell phone, my keys, my temper, or even my mind … I’d be SO skinny ~ Unknown

  • I hate long distance relationships. That’s why I moved the fridge into my bedroom ~ Unknown

  • Wrestling is obviously fake. Why would two people fight over a belt when neither of them are wearing pants? ~ Unknown

  • Why do people say ‘no offense’ right before they’re about to offend you? ~ Anonymous

That was our 30 Quotes to cheer you up today. What is your favourite funny quote.